Whoever loses their life will save it

I was reading in Mark 8 where Jesus predicts his crucifixion. “He then began to teach them that the Son of Man must suffer many things and be rejected by the elders, the chief priests and the teachers of the law, and that he must be killed and after three days rise again. He spoke plainly about this, and Peter took him aside and began to rebuke him. But when Jesus turned and looked at his disciples, he rebuked Peter. ‘Get behind me, Satan!’ he said. ‘You do not have in mind the concerns of God, but merely human concerns.’ Mark 8:31-33 Jesus leaves this private conversation with Peter and calls not only his disciples over but the crowd over. I bet Peter waited anxiously for what his Messiah would say after he was just rebuked. He might have thought Jesus was about to change the subject and start teaching about a different topic entirely. When Jesus opened his mouth and uttered these words, I imagine Peter’s heart dropped. “Whoever wants to be my disciple must deny themselves and take up their cross and follow me. For whoever wants to save their life will lose it, but whoever loses their life for me and for the gospel will save it. What good is it for someone to gain the whole world, yet forfeit their soul?” Mark 8:34-36 Peter just tried to tell his Messiah that He can’t be crucified. Now Jesus is saying all of them must “pick up their cross” and “lose your life for me.” What would the crowd’s reaction have been? I imagine Jesus lost a lot of followers that day. Crucifixion was the most grotesque form of death. It was the thing Romans used to terrify people into submission. It was against the law to crucify a Roman citizen. They only used it on people groups they conquered. Now this Jewish teacher is saying take up your “cross” and follow me. All of Jesus’s disciples, except John, were killed for the gospel (John was exiled to the island of Patmos). Two of Jesus’s disciples were crucified, including Peter. They found something this world couldn’t offer. A deep relationship with the Creator of the universe. That’s what gave them the strength to endure the persecution. It wasn’t pure determination but reliance on the Holy Spirit dwelling within them. Crucifixion isn’t a way any nation kills criminals today. None of us will die this way. Most of us living in the west won’t even face martyrdom for Christ. So, does this principle still apply to us? When Jesus said this statement was, He saying that all believers of that time would be crucified? No. He seems to have used it also as a metaphor. So, what does that mean to walk around “picking up our cross “and “losing our life” for the gospel? Well, we know it’s not comfortable. He used crucifixion as a metaphor to show that denying our flesh and following Christ would be sufferable. Jesus taught a lot about denying ourselves. He taught about turning the other cheek. He said things like if you lust you’ve already committed adultery in your heart. He said if you call your brother fool, you’re guilty enough to go to hell. He warns of the love of money; both poor and wealthy people can be guilty of this. It’s not about having money but relying on money instead of Christ. Following Christ’s teachings are all ways of “picking up our cross.” We often think we are going to have this American dream. Then if something like tragedy or disease strikes, we feel like we were robbed. The Bible never says we are going to have our dreams come true. Every disciple of Jesus’s endured much suffering in this life. When bad things happen, we have an opportunity to shine Christ’s light. We have an opportunity to pick up our cross and show the love Jesus showed as He walked to His crucifixion. A few days after my car accident I was in severe pain and complete confusion. The brain injury made me annoyed at EVERYTHING (which is not my nature). I remember my mom and brother trying to ask me question upon question in order to help me. “Do you need this, do you need that?” etc. I could only comprehend 60% of what they were saying because of the TBI. I was upset and angry. I wanted to burst. Every question felt like nails on a chalk board to me. Yet I knew, if I were to tell them off- it would devastate them. They were already heartbroken watching me suffer. But I could make it so much worse hurting them with my actions and words. I was teaching College Bible studies, I had been a youth leader, and I was always telling people about Jesus at work and school. What business did I have doing that if I couldn’t even treat my family members with love when I was suffering?! I took a deep breath, calmed myself, and tried to be as kind as I could while they continued to ask me question upon question. I felt like God made me very aware that I could hurt a lot of people I loved because I was in pain. I decided that day that no matter how long this lasted, I was going to be intentional in every interaction so I wouldn’t hurt my loved ones with my behavior. I was nauseated, dizzy, in severe pain, and the more they talked the worse my symptoms often got. So I wanted to cut them off in impatience or straight up yell “shut up, stop!!” It was an extremely difficult choice to keep. I had to take it one day at a time. For me, it felt like picking up my cross because it wasn’t natural. It took intentionality and asking the Holy Spirit for help. Treating them in love rather than doing what was best for me was the way I knew how to pick up my cross and follow Christ. I would take a breath when I got overwhelmed or couldn’t understand them. I would remember they were trying to help. I would remember I had a platform to shine God’s love in the middle of this devastation. I was touched amazed when they started telling others about how much my love blessed them. I saw how God was working on me, through me, in the situation.

What good is it if I gained the whole world but lost my soul?! I did not lose my soul. I may have lost about everything else ;). I did not lose the most important thing. Who I am- God’s kid. Knowing His love. In the middle of the dark, I pressed in with Jesus and as I crucified my flesh- He poured out His love for others on me deeper. That is such a gift. Crucifixion of our flesh is painful. It is a daily, hourly choice. When I think of the best things I have in life: deep relationships, sweet moments, and character. They are a result of me NOT doing what I wanted in the moment and doing what I thought would honor God, “crucifying my flesh.” When we “lose our lives for Christ” we really do “save them” as Jesus said.