Warrior Princess

This photoshoot was done as an artistic interpretation of the battles we fight in this world. For some people, their battle is losing a loved one, for others, it is a difficult marriage; for some, it is a disease, for others, it is financial hardship, etc, etc. For me, it’s been my health. I have fought hard for 9 years to stay alive, to learn to walk again, and to slowly make progress forward.

For this photoshoot, I got all dressed up and pushed through my symptoms to do it. My brother Nic, who is a talented, professional photographer, was also a caregiver to me for the shoot. He pushed me in a wheelchair through a dirt trail, balancing my oxygen on my lap, to get to the location. 

While I was posing for the pictures we laughed and had a good time. Then I started to faint due to my blood condition, and Nic had to help me safely get to the ground. I was also having pain breathing during the photo shoot. I pushed through the pain and fatigue, but I was forced to put my oxygen on, sit down, and recuperate before we finished the photos.  

During these breaks, Nic started snapping photos of me. I didn’t realize it at first because I was just trying to breathe and close my eyes because I had a headache due to the light (I’m still sensitive to light due to the brain injury). Then I realized he was taking photos. We both kinda paused and realized that at this moment he was capturing my battle in real-time.  

I still have to fight many days to get out of bed, to make myself get up in the middle of the pain, weakness, and fatigue. I’ve learned to keep pushing forward even though my damaged vision makes it hard to walk. I’ve learned to look to the Lord for strength, comfort, and peace. And I have found it in Him. 🙂

He is the reason I don’t let hopelessness defeat me. He is the reason I have the inspiration to keep going. The Bible says that the “sword” we use to wage war is the word of God. So the things God has said in scripture and what He speaks to my spirit, I hold on to. Many times during my illness, and isolation in bed, I felt alone, but I remembered that God said in His scripture He’d “Never leave us or forsake us.” 

So when I felt alone I would hold on to that truth and believe it. He was with me, sitting by my sickbed. He was with me as my legs stumbled and physical therapists helped me learn to walk again. He was with me when I cried to Him about my heartbreak. He was there cheering me on and celebrating when my health made progress. Choosing to believe His words, about not leaving us, was me using my sword. 

Ephesians 6:17

“Take the helmet of salvation and the Sword of the Spirit, which is the Word of God.”